It was not too long ago that I took a step back and looked at myself. I was in my early thirties. I was a professional. I was a father and a husband. I was all these things, but it occured to me, that these descriptors were not the way the world at large saw me.
How does the world see me? When someone on the street passes me by and gives a furtive glance, what is their initial impression? Do they think me a man who "carries himself well?" Am I someone who looks like they have it together? What do people think?
Well I had two options here. The first option was to devise and fabricate a machine that would allow me to read people's minds, and once they've been read, change them through shear willpower. After many attempts at creating such a machine, the cat still did not like me, and so I wrote this off as a failure.
Option two was to begin the process of a complete personal overhaul. I set out to become a gentleman. While I cannot control what people think of me, I can control what I do, how I behave, how I look and how I live.
So I began a journey. One that I am still at the beginning of. I began the long process of becoming a gentleman.
Now, don't get me wrong. I have often tried to be polite. I pull out chairs and open doors when I am being chivalrous. I chew with my mouth closed and I don't (often) put my elbows on the table.
But what does it mean to be a gentleman?
What are the social norms involved? How do various cultures define "gentlemanly" attributes? Are there commonalities.
It is with these questions in tow that I begin my male version of Bridget Jones. Over the coming months, years, decades, I intend to document the whole process here. From minute adjustments to overall broad sweeping changes, everything will be here.
You are, of course, welcome to disagree, and I welcome the conversation.
You are also welcome to submit ideas or principles that you believe to be gentle in nature.
So please, take part in, read, enjoy my pursuit of: